Two weeks ago, a buddy of mine (we’ll call him Ted) wasn’t allowed to attend a “Penthouse party” on the upper east side.

Why?

His girlfriend wouldn’t let him. It was a glorified house party on a rooftop, but since the word “Penthouse” was used she cracked the whip.

Long story short, the kid is whipped unlike anything I’ve ever seen–and he has no idea. You could write a movie called Whipped and he would be the main character. His Facebook relationship status literally says married (they’ve only been dating six months) and yet he’s in the dark about his whippage–as a man, it’s just damn sad.

If you have a girlfriend, AskMen’s Top 10 Signs You Are Whipped is an absolute must read because like Ted you might be blind to your whippeage.

Society has been telling women for years that the sexiest thing to sport under just about anything is a thong. But what do guys really think? What do they really want to see when they shimmy that girl out of her newest pair of skinnies? Or, do they even really care? I mean…they got our pants off. Isn’t that enough?

He Said:
Guys don’t really know much about women’s underwear past “This type gives me a boner, that type doesn’t.” When you’re in high school (or from Long Island), thongs are the best thing this side of Steak and a Blow Job Day–mainly because the tops of thongs usually pop up above girls’ pants, drawing our eyes and attention directly to the butt part of the body, flooding our imaginations with arrest-worthy thoughts.

Still, some (adult) dudes will tell you they like the thong best–on certain girls. But nowadays, it’s all about the boy-shorts. These fantastic bottoms create a magical under-ass area that does wonders for a man’s mood–if you’re depressed, just ask your girl to throw on a pair, you’ll see what I mean. They look good on girls of all shapes and sizes, are nice to touch when we’re fooling around, and are perfect attire for the WiiFit. Ladies, if you only have one type of underwear (which you don’t), make it boy-shorts–we’ll never complain. Read More »

Another week, another issue to dissect. This week we ask our resident male what he thinks of the infamous Three-Day Rule. Do guys really follow it? Do they really believe it? Should we all put our phones/laptops away for 72 hours until it is “safe” to contact our love interest? Or, just like all rules, is this one meant to be broken?

He Said:
Hmmm. The three-day rule is an interesting phenomenon, and while, like most of these ‘rules,’ I don’t think one needs to hold to it exactly, it does make sense. Basically what you want to do is send a message that you aren’t a completely desperate freak or some over-obsessed ‘I made a doll with your hair’ stalker. This goes for both men and women. Calling right after a date, while direct, says more then just ‘lets get together!’ It says ‘I have nothing to do, ever!’ And that is a warning sign.

One thing that isn’t often mentioned about what we look for in gals is if they have friends and a solid base of activities and hobbies. The last thing we want (assuming we are well-adjusted) is some girl who constantly calls us with updates on her location, what she had for lunch, and what flavor toothpaste she’s considering. We want someone who can go out on a date, have a good time, and then maybe the next day hang out with her friends, or spend some time with their mom, or even just read a book by herself. As someone who values solitude, a girl who likes time alone is very attractive, because it means I will also get time alone. Read More »

The girls over at College Candy read our our list of the 13 Facts About Women…Men Forget and came up with a rebuttal, “13 Truths About Men That They Will Lie About Until They Die, But We Are Insightful Enough to Figure Out No Matter How Much They Deny.”

The girls think their list is ingenious but let’s leave that for you guys to decide.

Check out “The 14 Truths About Men” here!

Women confuse men. That’s a given. But it’s not because we don’t learn from our past relationships; we just forget everything we learned in the time between one and the next. And we only remember how different the two genders are when a woman’s inherent eccentricities rear their wild head, once again.

To keep things in check, we’ve compiled a cheat sheet to help you keep your girl’s differences in perspective with COED’s 13 Facts About Women Men Forget. So no matter how cool the chick, chances are she (is)…

Full of Sh*t: Before you call NOW, let us just say that this is only a periodic trait, and exists in varying degrees. Most of the time, it comes out in what we like to call a “game,” but outside of a relationship it’s called lying. Basically, she tells you one thing, but means something more than her words. (Words only seem to matter when she remembers to use yours against you.) Other times, it happens when she thinks lying serves a purpose greater than the truth of the moment. So, she might have gone to lunch with her ex and said she didn’t–but he was a dick like usual, so it wasn’t a big enough deal to tell you about (i.e., she cares about you enough to not want to hurt your feelings, but not enough to stop looking elsewhere). Now, try going out with your ex… Read More »

Obnoxiously bright blues, greens and various shades of pink are walking, talking and dancing all around me. For some reason the intensely colored, and revealing dresses are the focus of my attention initially, not the girls wearing them. I can’t help but think this was a bad idea.

I’m nervous. This isn’t an excited, happy nervous; it’s an anxious, uncomfortable nervous. I’ve never been to a strip club before. I agreed to come here because I’m in New York City for the first time, my friends wanted to go, and it seems like the perfect time to try something new. Maybe I don’t like new.

Some of the girls are sitting and talking to customers, some are hanging around the edges of the club in small groups, and one girl is dancing on stage, slowly removing her clothes. I’m supposed to watch her, to be turned on, to want her. I don’t. I feel like a voyeur; averting my eyes from the stage like it’s something private meant for someone else. Read More »

After spending the last few months speaking at universities throughout the Northeast, there’s one question that keeps coming up. (No, it’s not ‘who farted?’ but that is funny.)

‘What’s the best way to approach women at school?’
Fret not, young ones. This month, I’m going to show you how to get some love in three different, everyday, mundane areas on campus. And, unlike alcoholism, you can solve this in just five steps!

Five Steps to First Base

1.Find her when she’s alone. It’s not as creepy as it sounds. You stand a greater chance of talking with her when she’s by herself than when she’s with her friends. She’ll be more receptive to your wily charms.

2.Observe something about her.
What is she doing? What is she wearing? What is she eating? What’s she reading? Does she have the same cell phone as you? Is that a knife? Remember, observations lead to conversations. Read More »

Listen, guys. I am a lady who has had sexual intercourse…oh…say….more than a few times. I am also a lady who does not want any STDs. Therefore, I am a lady who has safe sex. That means, you, male lovers, wear a condom.

Now most guys in my past haven’t thought twice about wearing a condom. Turns out most guys don’t want STDs, either! However, there have been a few who have whined…and even one more recently who made sex nearly impossible-because of condoms.

“I just can’t feel anything”…
“I don’t know how ANY guy can can come with these things…”

Those are two lines I heard from two separate guys in the last two weeks.

These remarks have infuriated me to the degree of broadcasting some tips to all of the male readers out there. Mind you, I’m well aware of the fact that MOST guys don’t mind condoms. But for those of you who do…. Read More »

Picking up the tab on the first date is always an awkward moment. Do you offer? Do you just sit there looking around the room and wait for him to take it? What do your actions say about you as a person? In this week’s He Said/She Said, we dive into first date etiquette. Who should be grabbing their wallet?

He Said:
Paying on the first date is completely inconsequential to me. I seriously don’t care. If I asked you out, then me paying makes sense to me, based only on logic. However, if she wants to pay, that’s fine, too. It doesn’t make me feel like any less of a man. Especially if I’ve somehow tricked some super-employed high powered lady into dating me (bonus!). Read More »

This week’s US Weekly magazine reports that dudes – Diddy and Jay-Z, among them – are following in their lady’s footsteps and hopping on the Bikini Wax bandwagon.

Let that sink in for a moment.

For those of you who don’t know much about bikini waxing (beyond how hot it is when a girl has just gotten one), I will sum it up for you:

Pros: You look bigger, girls are more willing to do naughty things to you, “bald is beautiful” (Jay-Z’s words, not mine).

Cons: Hot wax applied to your nether regions/crack, dried, then RIPPED OFF (along with all that unsightly hair). Yum.

I – along with ladies everywhere – just need to know: is this for real? Can we begin to look forward to our men (literally) feeling our pain/oral stimulation minus the hair hurdle?

 Loading ...